How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
you never un-have a 4some
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize