I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
