I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
