You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
