You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
