Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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