Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
