i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
