someone get that fucking seahorse.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
