This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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