is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
