Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
