I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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