Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
