Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
