Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
