3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
