I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
