I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
