So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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