nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
only if we run a train.
done.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
