one two three fourrrrnication!
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
