so explain again why im purple
no
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
