she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
