If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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