This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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