so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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