Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
