Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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