So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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