Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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