two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
