i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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