big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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