New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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