You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
