it wasn't lemon gatorade
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
