3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I think i peed on brittanys purse
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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