that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
