Moan for me like Helen Keller
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
