So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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