Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Enjoy the penises
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
