come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
