And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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