He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
