i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
