i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize