How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Randomize
