i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize
