I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
